Yeah. I gotta go here. Please hear me out. I think about things a lot and I try to talk to others about it, and I just get misunderstood and I end up being an accidental troll and upsetting people when I don't mean to and I just ache.
My grandfather left Spain three weeks after turning 17. He crossed an ocean alone and landed in Argentina. Later he arrived in New York. He was very liberal politically. He felt that it was the duty of a government to help its people when they needed it. This was such a strongly held belief that my father felt he had to mention it during his eulogy.
Abuelo built warships in Jacksonville during World War II. He read about the Civil War tearing his country apart from miles away and in a way it touched him here, too. His brother was a rabid conservative. My father remembers some great arguments between the two. It didn't dramatically tear the family apart or anything, but the two men were in a country were they could argue and it wouldn't cost them their lives. They took advantage and they got into some real humdingers, but they were always brothers. They never made personal attacks.
Abuelo would finally get to go back to visit Spain 60 years after he left, but I'm sure it wasn't his home any more. Abuelo had moved here and stayed here. He had become a citizen years before.
My grandmother grew up dirt poor on a farm near Tuscaloosa Alabama. She didn't talk politics much. She had a variety of jobs, but by the time I came along she was a city employee in Orlando. She worked in juvenile court. Not a big lawyer or police officer. My memory is fuzzy. She didn't go into great detail with a five year-year-old. All I remember are stories she told about some of the children that came through court. Children that broke her heart. She tried to talk to them and help them.
Like his father, my father was also very liberal. Even while his brother joined the military and fought in Vietnam. Thanks to the military, Uncle K was able to become a doctor. He was an OB/GYN. He chose to work in a life-affirming field. I have to wonder if the war was the reason. One of dad's sisters became a social worker.
My mother grew up in Mississippi. Her father ran a paper for a while. Her oldest brother fought in England during World War II. Mom used to tell me stories about her visits back home to Mississippi. Once in the early 60's, her mother (the grandmother I never knew) confessed in
whisper that she "was voting for Kennedy." Another brother fought to integrate schools and received death threats for it.
I grew up in an extremely liberal household. It was a liberalism steeped in
compassion,
empathy and
service. My parents never attacked someone for their politics. Sure, they disagreed with people and policies. Sometimes my dad even took the conservative stance with his liberal friends. He liked to stir the pot, but never resorted to personal attacks. Maybe it was easier to avoid pre-internet. Yes, my parents even complained about the country and the politicians, but they still managed to instill in me a pride for my country. Our country allowed for individual expression and people like Abuelo could come and try to make a living. People could debate and be a part of making things better.
My parents' liberalism is based on doing what is right because human compassion and empathy compels us to work toward that ideal. It pushed them to service. My grandfather was proud to be here. My grandmother was proud to be here.
The liberal voice that seems to be loudest these days just doesn't sound like that any more. It sounds like people who are angry because they can't get something. It sounds like people who hate this country. I mean an ugly hatred. And they don't want to hear anything different. They don't want to take the time to really listen to anyone. They want to jump on issues that are en vogue and ignore the bigger picture. We have so much work to do in this country. Being angry and divisive doesn't help anyone. The people who most need your help are not on the internet to hear you railing and attacking. You aren't doing them any favors.
I just don't want to think that our country is the oppressive devil some people seem to think it is. It makes me sad to think that the rest of the world thinks so poorly of us...even hates us for our policies. Not just our international relations, but apparently the way we treat our citizens is an object of ridicule. (I believe someone from the UK told me recently that our inability to give basic healthcare to our citizens "
horrifies the rest of the world"...I left their emphasis.) We've elected a president that promised healthcare reform. The Affordable Care Act was signed into law. I know it's not free. I know it isn't enough. Surely it is progress?
I am overwhelmed by what still needs to be done and I'm just an average Joe, imagine how the politicians feel.
We are a democracy. If the policy makers of your choice do not win, don't bitch and moan. It sounds like pouting. Yes, keep fighting, but please remember: You catch more flies with honey. You are alienating people when you need to be bringing them to your cause. You need to convince the unconvinced. Calling people names does not convince anyone to think about what you are saying. It will never help your cause come election time.
Now, let me warn you. I am about to climb a litter higher up on the soapbox. You may not want to read further.
I agree that no one should have their civil rights violated, but basic human needs should be met first. As a nation, we cannot fight for the civil rights of one group (ie: women, homosexuals) while we ignore the HUMAN rights of another (ie: undocumented workers, children living in poverty.) We have to work for everyone.
Sometimes it feels like the media picks up an issue for simply for it's sensationalism or it's "sexiness" (for lack of a better term.) Take women's health. The media has reduced me to my boobs and my hoo hoo. Breast cancer and cervical cancer are not the health issues I'm most likely to die from, but they are sexier. I'm convinced that's why we hear about them more. Heart disease is the number one killer of women. Cancer is second. Make no mistake though, 40% of cancer deaths are from LUNG cancer. 20% are from breast cancer.
Meanwhile, people scream for a poor woman's right to free breast exams or birth control and gynecological exams. What about her right to free nicotine patches to help her quit smoking or her right to good food, not mass produced crap? Both would help her health more.
Please forgive me for spewing all this. I am frustrated that the ideals my grandparents and parents believed in are being sullied by a bunch of loud-mouthed, angry people and a sensationalist media. I am sad that I can't engage in a conversation with someone without being cursed at. I'm told I should ignore them. I always tell my daughter: be part of the solution, not part of the problem. Maybe ignoring them would be part of the solution. But somehow ignoring the growing division between the two parties seems like part of the problem. How will we ever function if average citizens can't even talk without attacking each other? How will we ever progress if we let courteous debate die and let calm public discourse wither? Are we a reflection of our politicians or are they a reflection of us?
